do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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