i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm too high and old for this...
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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