bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize
