So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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