I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
