This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
