I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize