At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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