like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
