i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Randomize
