I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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