Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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