I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
