so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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