i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Someone signed my nipple.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
