You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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