how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
