here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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