people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
