Are we in a gay sports bar?
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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