Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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