He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Randomize
