I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
