Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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