I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
