I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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