Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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