She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
