Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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