so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize