Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize