i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
