He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
