I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
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