I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
