I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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