This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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