is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
