Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
