would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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