watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
