I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
