After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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