i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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