if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
