Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
