YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
