Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
