An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Randomize
