Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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