a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
