so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
